CONTEST: Violent Torpedo of Truth

Everyone's favorite crackhead warlock invades NYC tonight in what is sure to be a memorable experience.

While he's not in Astoria (thank gawd), we want to send a rogue reporter to the show ($120 value). If you have enough Adonis DNA and tiger blood in you to see Sheen in person, here's what we need you to do:

Tell us in the comments below how Charlie Sheen could he be #winning if he lived in Astoria.

The person who contributes the "Sheeniest" comment by 5pm will win a ticket to tonight's Radio City Music Hall performance at 8p.

Tags: Adonis DNA, Radio City, Radio City Music Hall, celebrity, charlie sheen, contest, idiot, nyc, sheen, tiger blood, More…train wreck, winning

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Comment by Ran Craycraft on April 8, 2011 at 5:40pm: The Astoria=goddesses connection sealed the deal!

Comment by Melissa Hoffmann on April 8, 2011 at 5:36pm: Wow. Which one did you think was best?

Comment by Ran Craycraft on April 8, 2011 at 5:29pm: These were effing great. Likely better than tonight's show.
Congrats to Melissa Hoffmann, you've proven your DNA is in fact, adonis. Look for a ticket in your email inbox. Enjoy, and let us know about the show via blog: http://www.whyleaveastoria.com/profiles/blog/new

Comment by Adam Ullian on April 8, 2011 at 5:06pm: "Astoria has some beautiful goddesses, and I am their Thor, and anyone who attempts to conquer my white mountain of angel bliss will cry at my thunderous roar and fall against my electric lightning bolts of brain power."

Comment by Stephanie on April 8, 2011 at 4:47pm: Top Three reasons this Warlock, aka Charles Adonis Blood Sheen should live in Astoria:

1. He can sell his own brand of C. Sheen Beer at the Beer Garden, call it Warlock Piss, cause the piss of a warlock is betta then no piss at all! #WINNING

2. They can re-name the Sculpture Park C. Sheens no trolls allowed corner, cause what adonis in their right mind would let trolls roam around free? #WINNING

3. Last, but never least: Re-arange the letters in Astoria, NY MAN and dont you see what youve got A Nasty Man I am R.. BOOM .. IM NASTY AND IM #WINNING! C. Sheen OUT!!

Comment by Melissa Hoffmann on April 8, 2011 at 4:40pm: Astoria, a bitchin' boro where a Warlock can be #WINNING without being TMZ'd up the butt.

Comment by Chad Marra on April 8, 2011 at 3:53pm: "Banging out seven gram rocks" and spreading Adonis DNA is feasible at Cavo on a Saturday night. #WINNING

Comment by Chad Marra on April 8, 2011 at 3:36pm: He can construct his own narcissistic art installation or sculpture at Socrates Sculpture Park. http://www.socratessculpturepark.org/exhibitions/artist-opps.php #WINNING

Comment by Melissa Hoffmann on April 8, 2011 at 3:32pm: #fastball The N/Q isn't just a subway line, it's a spaceship; Astoria is Mars, just with hotter chicks.

Comment by Ryan Mingin on April 8, 2011 at 3:27pm: Astoria, the melting pot that is NYC:

Caucasian,

African American, Middle Eastern,

Vatican Warlock Assassin Alchemist F-18 with Fire-Breathing Fists and a Secret Army

And its a quick subway ride home aftera night of trashing a room at The Plaza and locking you "date" in the bathroom